Sunday, January 20, 2008

Death of Chia

Grandma got the girls a Chia Pet Garfield for Christmas. This is what it's supposed to look like when it's "done".

It included a product registration card, which cracked me up. What, are they going to contact me when my Chia Pet gets recalled for some life-threatening malfunction? "If received as a gift, why did the giver choose a Chia Pet for you?" The selection of answers did NOT include: "How the hell should I know?"

So of course who gets to take care of THEIR Chia pet? Mom!! First thing you do is soak its little head for 24 hours.

Then you make this seed slurry, which also takes 24 hours. I should have read the directions before I started or I could have done those simultaneously, but of course I did not. Then you apply the seed slurry to the crevices in Garfield's head.

Then you sit back and wait a few days and it starts to sprout, half-heartedly. And because it's cold and drafty and low-humidity here, it also becomes a big crusty scab of seeds which starts to pull away from Garfield's head.

So finally since the seeds are no longer moistened by the clay and they don't sprout, they begin to mold and the sprouts die off. And you're left with Garfield's head with a grotesque scab peeling off of it, like his brains are separating from his skull in some horrific way.


The scab went down the garbage disposal. We'll try again in spring.

The end.

6 comments:

Fe-lady said...

You mean you didn't use the sprouts on a salad?
Why do things never look like they do in TV? :-)

Mommymeepa said...

My condolences.
Thanks though for the heads up. We bought two this summer at a garage sale unopened and saved them to do this winter, so now I will wait.

I had a fun time reading this post.

Rainmaker said...

I think if you find success in chia-growing by summer, that you ouchg to make your profile picture that of a Garfield Chia.

21stCenturyMom said...

Did you keep his head full of water? You have to do that, too.

Nancy Toby said...

Oh.

I guess I really should have read the directions.... oops.

:-)

Shawn said...

We used to buy Chia Pets as gag gifts for each other in my family. Actually, we re-gifted the same three or four; no one ever thought to actually open it up and try to grow it...

Ch-ch-ch-chia!